Crying into my EU flag neckerchief...

In anticipation of my October trip to Germany I have been proudly wearing my EU flag neckerchief these last few weeks.

What a good job it was handy, so Gail could wipe the tears from my eyes (and then her own) when we heard the news from Westminster today...

An interesting story.....

...about today's European Union elections.

Hold on readers, bear with me!

You might say it's really about the surprising and sometimes delightful connections we can make through blogging.

It all started with a post on one of our very favourite blogs. Scotsman Angus lives in deepest France and blogs in a consistently engaging fashion about life with his Polish Lowland Sheepdogs Bob and Sophie and much else besides.

Now you may already be aware that across Europe today (Thursday), elections to the European Parliament are taking place. On Tuesday Angus posted some photos of French election posters, and Gail responded by commenting that here in Scotland she had received lots of election leaflets through the door, but regrettably none from the solidly pro-EU Liberal Democrat Party.

You'll never guess what happened later that day.

Early evening Gail and I answered a knock on the door. (I did not bark, I am not that kind of terrier.)

We were greeted by a lady with a smiling face and a fistful of Lib Dem leaflets.

So much, so unremarkable, I hear you thinking.

But then...

She announced herself not only as the lead candidate for the Scottish Liberal Democrats in the current EU election, but also as an avid fan of both my blog and Angus's. She had seen Gail's comment on Angus's blog, done a spot of detective work and identified our address, and hastened round in person to rectify the shortfall in Lib Dem election material.

What a star!

Oh she said such nice things about my blog too, I think Gail would be voting for her party even if she hadn't already been intending to.

We do hope she is elected and has the opportunity to remain an MEP for a very long time to come....

Aberdeen South constituency news

Please come here Gail, I have a question! I see our MP has put his newsletter through the door. It says he's quite wonderful. What do you make of that?

Well Bertie, in general, Members of Parliament find it expedient to remind their constituents of their existence when they fear that an election might be pending.

So you'd vote for him next time then would you? After all, he says he's campaigning for a fair share of government cash for Aberdeen. That has to be good, doesn't it?

Harrumph...

Why are you harrumphing Gail?

Well Bertie, have you noticed that in this newsletter, our MP is entirely silent on by far the most significant issue facing the nation right now? Not a single mention of the 'B' word.

How very puzzling Gail. Why on earth would he not want to be talking about Brexit?

Bertie, one does not, I think, have to be Sherlock Holmes to find the answer to this particular conundrum. Ross Thomson is the Scottish Conservative's biggest cheerleader for a 'hard' Brexit, but represents a constituency, Aberdeen South, which voted 68% in favour of remaining in the EU.

Hmm. Yes, even I, a dog, can see that might be a problem for him. But look Gail, he is supporting a ban on electric shock collars for us pups. Is that not just as important?

I am sorry to be so cynical my lad, but it strikes me as a desperate attempt to, er, 'collar' the dog owner vote. He'll be out kissing babies next. And for sure he's hoping that everyone's forgotten about those reports of him being ejected from a House of Commons bar late at night a couple of months ago, accused of being drunk and of 'inappropriate touching' of other men in the bar.

Wow. It seems to me that the more one knows about Mr Thompson the less inclined one would be to vote for him. Oh dear Gail, whatever happened to that nice Anne Begg from Labour who used to be MP round here? A thoroughly admirable person. Maybe she could be persuaded to stand again?

Oh Bertie, if only.

Look, I found this on Anne Begg's Twitter feed. Our readers might be bored of us going on about Brexit but I'm thinking they will enjoy listening to Anne's friend Alastair Campbell playing bagpipes.

A word about Wojtek

I expect you would all prefer that I steered clear of the dreaded topic of Br*x*t.

Well I do try to keep my mind on higher things, but you know how it is, every now and then, something reminds you of what a pickle my country has got itself into.

So on Thursday, en route to Nottingham by train, Gail and I stopped off for a walk around Edinburgh for an hour or so, and we ran into these fine fellows in Princes Gardens.

Meet Wojtek, the brown bear from Syria, adopted by a company of brave Polish soldiers in World War Two. Wojtek helped carry ammunition in the battle against the Nazis at Monte Cassino and had many other adventures before spending the final years of his long and remarkable life in Edinburgh Zoo.

Many Polish soldiers who contributed so much to defending our country settled in Britain after the War (including the fathers of Gail's school friends Bronia and Halina). More recently, of course, large numbers of enterprising Poles have come to the UK for work, enjoying the fruits of decades of peace in the European Union.

Gail and I think we know what Wojtek and his Polish soldiers would have thought of the knaves and fools in charge of this country's future relationship with the rest of Europe.

We visited Human Granny yesterday, and found her in good spirits, if ever more bent and also worried about what sort of a country her grandchildren (who most certainly did not vote for Brexit) will inherit.

Bertie ponders Britain and the EU...

Hmmm. Brexit then? Almost an anagram of Bertie, you'll note.

Gail pointed out that, in advance of the June referendum, all self-respecting media commentators in the UK have been pontificating on whether Britain should "stay in Europe" and she suggested I should do the same.

Wearing my Boffin hat, the first thing to say is that, barring the unexpected and sudden appearance of an oceanic spreading ridge down the middle of the English channel, Britain is and will remain geographically part of Europe, at least within the time scale normally considered in this blog. The question is of course is about economic and political relationships.

To be honest, the pros and cons of UK remaining 'in' are somewhat beyond my pay grade. I tried Googling 'EU + dogs' but the search results were dominated by rants about puppy farms in Lithuania, sad indeed but not strictly relevant here.

So I decided to investigate the attitudes to dogs of various prominent human participants in the EU debate.

I confess to being disappointed that Mayor of London and recently declared 'Outie' Boris Johnson, although himself often acting like an overgrown and attention seeking puppy, appears to be disinclined to pose for photographs alongside my own species (fearful of being outshone, one suspects). More understandably perhaps, one leader of the 'In' campaign, former postman Alan Johnson - no relation to Boris - also seems wary of my kind.

But what to make of the fact that Europe's most powerful woman Angela Merkel, although undoubtedly pro Britain staying 'in', is distantly anti when it comes to any kind of canine companion - especially one belonging to Mr Putin?

Ms Merkel's ally, our own UK Prime Minister, was in his early days as leader known for 'husky hugging' but his credentials as a dog lover were somewhat dented when he very nearly dropped a wriggly terrier puppy on a fraught visit to Battersea dogs home.

Back to the Brexiters, I finally struck gold with Michael Gove, perhaps the most senior Tory MP to declare he wants 'Out'.

Who could not love a man so unembarrassed to be photographed embracing his much adored powder puff Bichon Frise, Snowy? Isn't she cute? Surely her owner must be a man of sound judgement? And what's more, he comes from Aberdeen! Yes I think I am convinced. Bertie for Brexit it is!

Oh. Gail is giving me a disapproving look and saying something about reduced treat rations and no more help with the blog unless I change my mind.

They said this was going to get nasty…

Noisy Koreans and EU Bureaucracy

If, like me, you live with a human who goes out to work at a 'regular' job, you'll know how delightful it is when said human comes home early, unexpectedly.

Oh those magic words: "Bertie, I'm working at home this afternoon, please make room on the sofa".

It seems that Gail had been tasked with deciphering an impenetrable European Union tender document, concerning a topic somewhat outside her area of expertise, and her office was swamped with noisy Korean visitors energetically debating 'issues' relating to the execution of a different project, so she had come home for some peace and quiet.

I thought maybe I could help her translate the EU-ese into plain English.

I looked closely at the document, …

… told Gail it could be summarised in the simple word 'gobbledygook', and continued my nap.

Two hours later, Gail sighs heavily and says: "Bertie, you were right". Then: "Come on, we'd better go out for some fresh air before I start coming over all Nigel Farage".