Bertie shows his lack of patience...

THE FESTIVE PHOTOSHOOT

When northern air is crisp and bright,
And woodland scents excite one's nose,
A bouncing chap thinks it not right
To have to sit and calmly pose.

That perfect Christmas photograph
Can wait another day (or year).
Just watch me gallop down the path,
Then pause to sniff - is this a deer?

My mission's to investigate
Each blade of grass, each fallen leaf.
I absolutely cannot wait,
Our winter daylight's all too brief.

So please accept apologies,
We have no festive pics to show.
This turbo-powered WFT
Has things to do, places to go.

PS from Gail: tomorrow Bertie and I are heading our separate ways on our Christmas vacations, and so this blog too will be "out of office" for a couple of weeks. We wish all our friends a joyful Festive Season. Thank you so much for reading, and we'll be back again just before New Year.

But where were their kilts?

In the failing mid-afternoon light, Gail took me for a walk yesterday in the grounds of Crathes Castle.

As I did my "pose nicely Bertie" bit in front of the 16th century tower house, I could hear sounds of high spirited humanity echoing in my flappy little ears.

I wanted to run across and make friends with the group behind me, who all seemed to be having such a fun time taking each other's pictures and generally larking about. But Gail told me I had to keep my distance, 'cos the bride and bridesmaids wouldn't want muddy paws on their dresses.

Well you could have knocked me down with a feather. A wedding party? Surely not! I mean, look at all those men in suits. Where were their kilts??

I had always assumed kilts were compulsory male attire at these occasions, especially if your wedding venue happens to be a genuine Scottish Castle.

But Gail insisted that it is, in this country, permitted for the groom and best man etc. to wear suits with trousers, or in fact any other outfit of their choosing, and the near ubiquity of kilt-wearing is through choice and is in no way obligatory.

Well my oh my, you learn something new every day.

Nature Friday: Bertie takes care of the ferns

Welcome to the LLB Gang's Nature Friday folks.

So I came across this fern in a walk through the woods last week, and suggested to Gail that it might need watering.

After all, dehydration is always a danger, right?

Gail says "wrong", and dehydration is not in general an issue for woodland plants in December in Scotland.

But I still say the precautionary principle is always best...

And I'm off to find some more ferns to water now.

Spanish lessons

I suspected something was up when I noticed how much time Gail was spending staring as some app on her phone called Duolingo, and leafing through an ancient Spanish dictionary.

Finally today she confessed to me that she will soon be going away on a Christmas holiday to Mexico, abandoning me to spend a week at neighbour Yvonne's (OK) and then a week in 'camp' (the horror....)

Now I will say I am at least relieved Gail is making some attempt to master a few phrases in Spanish, as I suspect a combination of schoolgirl French, German learnt as an adult, some long forgotten bits of Latin and the ability to speak English loudly and slowly, might not be much help when trying to negotiate her way round Mexico City and environs with her American friend Marse.

However, I fear that Duolingo is not quite coming up to the mark in some important areas, so I have been doing some research on Google Translate, and respectfully suggest that Gail might commit to memory the following text:

 Or what about?

Or best of all?

Perhaps my friends could suggest some more useful phrases Gail might learn. She is not leaving for another week so there is time...