An important and difficult pawlitical question

Is it acceptable to think that Dilyn, the dog belonging to Prime Minister Boris Johnson and his girlfriend Carrie Symonds, is super cute?

It's something I've been pondering while imprisoned in the kitchen these past two weeks.

P.S. Gail has promised me that the workmen will only be here one more day...

If only dogs could vote...

So Gail, I gather that we in the UK will shortly have a new Prime Minister?

Yes Bertie, that is correct, Theresa May has been forced to stand down as leader of the Conservative party, and the process of electing her successor, who will be our new Prime Minister, begins this week. 

You know what, Gail? I have a theory about why Mrs May failed as PM.

(Gail groans silently.) Er, do tell me Bertie.

Well, it seems to me that it would all have gone so much better if she had a dog.  After all, Winston Churchill (who needs no introduction) was well known to adore his poodle Rufus. Clement Attlee, whose government founded the NHS and the welfare state, was also a dog lover. Awesome achievers, both PMs.  So I'm thinking, which of the many contenders for the Tory leadership is particularly fond of pups? Surely that would be a promising sign?

Churchill and Rufus

Clement Attlee and Ting

Well Bertie, it's an interesting theory....

So anyway, I've researched the issue thoroughly, it seems to me the best choice would be either Michael Gove (owner of Bichon Frise Snowy, whose name may or may not be a coded reference to Gove's recently admitted history of cocaine use) or Rory Stewart, who adopted a dog, Babur, when he walked across Afghanistan, as described most movingly in his book, 'The Places in Between'. A book that you read and, I believe, enjoyed. Incidentally, both of these contenders are Scottish, and Michael Gove was even brought up in Aberdeen, surely a point in his favour?

Michael Gove and Snowy

Rory Stewart and Babur

Slight problem Bertie, only Members of Parliament and, ultimately, members of the Conservative party, get to vote for their leader, so neither you nor I qualify.

Oh, that's a shame Gail. Who do you think will win?

Bertie, the bad news is that it's almost certainly going to be Boris...

Boris Johnson and twin..

Bertie ponders Britain and the EU...

Hmmm. Brexit then? Almost an anagram of Bertie, you'll note.

Gail pointed out that, in advance of the June referendum, all self-respecting media commentators in the UK have been pontificating on whether Britain should "stay in Europe" and she suggested I should do the same.

Wearing my Boffin hat, the first thing to say is that, barring the unexpected and sudden appearance of an oceanic spreading ridge down the middle of the English channel, Britain is and will remain geographically part of Europe, at least within the time scale normally considered in this blog. The question is of course is about economic and political relationships.

To be honest, the pros and cons of UK remaining 'in' are somewhat beyond my pay grade. I tried Googling 'EU + dogs' but the search results were dominated by rants about puppy farms in Lithuania, sad indeed but not strictly relevant here.

So I decided to investigate the attitudes to dogs of various prominent human participants in the EU debate.

I confess to being disappointed that Mayor of London and recently declared 'Outie' Boris Johnson, although himself often acting like an overgrown and attention seeking puppy, appears to be disinclined to pose for photographs alongside my own species (fearful of being outshone, one suspects). More understandably perhaps, one leader of the 'In' campaign, former postman Alan Johnson - no relation to Boris - also seems wary of my kind.

But what to make of the fact that Europe's most powerful woman Angela Merkel, although undoubtedly pro Britain staying 'in', is distantly anti when it comes to any kind of canine companion - especially one belonging to Mr Putin?

Ms Merkel's ally, our own UK Prime Minister, was in his early days as leader known for 'husky hugging' but his credentials as a dog lover were somewhat dented when he very nearly dropped a wriggly terrier puppy on a fraught visit to Battersea dogs home.

Back to the Brexiters, I finally struck gold with Michael Gove, perhaps the most senior Tory MP to declare he wants 'Out'.

Who could not love a man so unembarrassed to be photographed embracing his much adored powder puff Bichon Frise, Snowy? Isn't she cute? Surely her owner must be a man of sound judgement? And what's more, he comes from Aberdeen! Yes I think I am convinced. Bertie for Brexit it is!

Oh. Gail is giving me a disapproving look and saying something about reduced treat rations and no more help with the blog unless I change my mind.

They said this was going to get nasty…