Oh dear, oh dear, I do hope Gail will forgive me and understand I didn't mean it.
You know, I like my blog posts to be honest, and to give my readers a true picture of what's been going on in my life, but I can scarcely bear to write about this.
I feel so very very badly.
And it had been such a lovely walk, along the River Dee with neighbour Yvonne and her flat-coated retriever Jake. Jake and I are not exactly best pals, but we generally rub along together quite happily. And it was such a pretty afternoon, although you'll have to take my word for it as Gail forgot her camera.
In retrospect I'm wondering if Jake was envious 'cos I was allowed in the front of Yvonne's car with Gail while Jake was confined to the boot.
Anyway, it was all peace and goodwill until we arrived back in our street and got out of the car.
Really I don't know quite how it happened or what I did to make Jake so cross.
All I know is that Gail and Yvonne were standing in the street nattering on as usual, then all of a sudden Jake had me by the scruff of the neck and was shaking me quite hard. I shrieked and squealed and Gail tried to prize me from his jaws but he wouldn't let go and in my utter panic I bit her arm and then Yvonne managed to pull Jake away.
It happened so quickly.
Gail checked my neck for signs of injury, but found none.
She insisted that her arm was OK, only bleeding a wee bit, nothing that a good soaking of Dettol couldn't sort.
Later she noticed an open wound on my side, and out came the Dettol again.
Oh dear but I feel just terrible, and not because of my injury.
How could I have hurt my precious human? She is the world to me.
Back home, I made sure I stayed close by her all evening, giving her cuddles and letting her know that I was so very sorry.
I tried to lick her hurt arm better, but soon understood that this was not appropriate behaviour.
Lying beside her on the sofa, my legs started to tremble and I couldn't stop them, and Gail made a phone call.
Oh dear, I do hope she wasn't arranging for me to be adopted.
I didn't want to want to go out for my late evening comfort walk. I really didn't. I felt scared.
Sunday morning update from Gail: poor Bertie is still very out of sorts this morning, and his side is apparently sore, so we are off to the emergency vet clinic later today.