Thursday 23 August 2018

How high do you pee?

Greetings from Bouncing Bertie Boffin, advisor to Blogville on all matters scientific!

Today, we return to the perennially fascinating topic of the bladder emptying habits of the male dog.

I expect some of my readers already saw reports of important recent research which concluded that small dogs pee higher up lampposts in order to appear bigger than they really are.

As so often with science, a new finding, while in itself interesting, prompts a whole host of further questions, all just begging to be addressed by some would-be Nobel Prize winning researcher.

For example, one wonders if exceptionally high pee-ers have an increased tendency to groin strain, and if so, might regular practice of doga mitigate the danger of such an injury?

Also, does the height of the pee decrease towards the end of a long walk, when a chap is tiring and the effort of elevating his rear limb might not seem so much worth the bother? 

Has anyone ever investigated whether the urge to impress through pee height is particularly prevalent in adolescent dogs? (I believe that not dissimilar behaviour is sometimes observed in young males of sp. Homo sapiens....)

And how, I ask, do female dogs use urination as a means of asserting status?

Oh yes, and getting rather personal here, am I alone in occasionally getting confused about bodily functions and cocking my leg when doing a poop?

As can be seen in the pictures below, although I count in the 'small to medium' size category (being a somewhat oversized WFT, 43cm at the shoulder) I am fully capable of competing with the little guy illustrated in the research paper, in terms of angle of leg lift.

However, I have been known to topple over while peeing, especially on icy ground, an accident which I regret to inform you is generally met with laughter not sympathy from my unfeeling human.

I am still hoping to persuade Gail to collect data on the exact height of my carefully placed marks. But she seems strangely resistant to the idea, protesting that the thought of our neighbours spotting her taking photos of me peeing in the first place was quite embarrassing enough, and she really isn't prepared to have to explain to some curious passer-by why she is fumbling around the base of a tree with a tape measure while trying to locate the damp patch.

Sometimes one is forced to question Gail's commitment to the whole scientific endeavour.


  1. Bertie - No science needed. A boy just has to do what a boy has to do.

    1. And if there are two boys in the household, then whomever goes outside second always has to aim higher!

  2. Oh wow you are a fab high-peer (I think they should add that sports to da Owlympigs). we have a way to find it out without alarming da whole hood... we pee on da legs of our staff and then we take the measurement from their pants... but that works not, when they wear shorts.

  3. Hari OM
    BOL... oh, Bertie lad, I am sorry that I lauged, but really, it amazes me to see what some consider worth investigating in such scientific terms!!! As Angus says- boys and boys. Still, your questions are appropriate one feels. Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

  4. Ummmm, you lost this airhead at the maths bit...angles etc...luckily being a girlie I just squat and go, phew, what a relief!
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

  5. Love you Bertie. I am laughing at the breakfast table, remembering all the times that Gus, also a Substantial Wire, toppled over while stretching for that last centimeter. And yes, I laughed. How could I not when he got up and barked at the tree or lamp post?

  6. MOL MOL MOL Bertie your Boffin research continues to amaze and delight us. Pee mail of all kinds by all species is most interesting.
    It appears to me that your glorious WFT tail is your pee mail rudder.
    Now if you are taking notes we indoor kit kats Female and Male all squat just a bit to leave pee mail. Her first cat Milky-Way was a male. She knew out of doors male cats like to mark their territory too. No leg lifting but lots of spraying. Somehow indoor males learn to squat. Mom is quite thankful for that too.
    Toto the mighty mini dachshund marched to his own peemail. It took him nearly a year to learn to lift his leg and I assure you it wasn't very high..cause he was vertically challenged.
    Hugs madi your bfff

  7. I tried to pee like that and fell over. Maybe it's because I'm a girl.

    Abby Lab

  8. Hi Bertie it's Walter here. I'm a medium sized boy of about 50 lbs (I don't know my height). I lift my leg every time I pee but the angle depends on what I'm trying to hit. We mostly pee in our yard so most often I'm trying to mark over where Millie has gone. For that I only lift my leg a few inches since she only squats in the grass. The other favorite target of mine are the many shrubs in the yard. I like to get right up close to them and lift my leg high to get maximum coverage. I would guess that I often reach that 120 degree mark or better. I will see if I can get my mom to take some pictures to take some measurements for you. This is a very interesting subject for us boy dogs. BTW I have never fallen over while performing these acts.

    1. We look forward to the +120 degree photos!

  9. The answer to how female dogs use urination to assert status is...we don't! We're far too sensible for that. We just pee low where it's easiest and move on!

  10. BOL - great post, Bertie. We boys think we pee high enough to top all the peemail that was delivered before us:) Misty says she could lift her leg if she wanted to but girls have a bit more modesty:) Mom always laughs when she remembers the first time Angel Phantom lifted his leg. He took a long time to figure it out, and then he discovered a wonderful tree for leg lifting. The only problem is that the first time he did it, he lifted the wrong leg:) BOL!!!

    Woos - Lightning, Misty, and Timber

  11. Hi hi hi! Ojo here! This is a very exciting conversation topic! I love pee!!!

    Cobi and I both lift our legs when we are marking, even though we are both girls. Cobi can only lift her right leg, so sometimes she has to contort her body into funny ways to make the pee mark! I can lift either leg though!

    But our legs do not go up as high as yours does! I think maybe girl dogs don't care as much about how high our pee is? However I did climb a rock face and splay myself against the almost vertical slope to pee on top of a high pee the other day!

    If we are just peeing, like first thing in the morning, we do not lift any legs.

    Cobi has a friend named Bolt who is 15 months old. (I do not like Bolt, but Cobi has a bit of a crush on him. He is still intact! But he is also a hooligan.)

    Bolt's leg goes almost straight up in the air, and he spins in circles sometimes to get his pee really high!

    Also, he sometimes forgets and pees on himself. Does this ever happen to you? It never happens to us girls, but I hear it happens often for some boy dogs?!?

    What a fun topic! More pee talk please!

    1. Thank you so much for your fascinating and most comprehensive response! I am please to report that I do not pee on myself.
      Toodle pip! Bertie.

  12. Don't really think Gail is going to help you with your Dui tries hard, but those short legs are a definite hindrance. He usually does the tripod poo, as well. Bella always wees over Dui's efforts, so she may be trying to be dominant in something...

  13. Arty here Bertie...and I also lift my leg so high that I have been known to stumble a bit...Jakey on the other hand, is more like Walter and lifts his leg as high as needed to hit his territorial marker!

    Good luck recruiting Gail's aid to continue researching your Pee Project!
    Rosy, Jakey & Arty

  14. Bertie my dad thoroughly enjoyed your scientific post...he and mom talked about it today on their walk.
    MOLMOL but there was no data collected...if you get my drift.
    Hugs madi your bfff

  15. Both Pip and now Ruby are low pee dogs - as in lifting their leg only about an inch or so. Short legs I guess.