Tuesday, 14 September 2010

Announcing the Bouncing Boffin!

Now that it's the new school year, my friends, we are going to turn attention to our broader education!

In particular, I have no doubt it has already occurred to you that matters scientific, whilst so crucial to our everyday lives in the twenty-first century, have been, to date, sadly neglected in blogs written by members of the species Canis lupus familiaris. 

Time to redress the balance!

Well I think you may know that my human carer Gail has pretensions to being some sort of a scientist.

And in a striking example of nurture triumphing over nature, I too am developing a fascination with the subject.

So I am planning a series of occasional lectures in the forthcoming winter months in which I intend to enlighten you all, giving the canine perspective on an assortment of fundamental scientific principles. Think of it as a dog's breakfast....

There will be no shying away from the challenging  topics - relativity, cosmology, evolution, quantum mechanics, genetics, earth science, biodiversity, nuclear physics and much else, all presented in a dog friendly manner and with my customary youthful bounce! (Gail is saying something about 'channeling my energies in a constructive fashion'.)

What's more, if any of my canine friends out there want to propose a topic that might be worthy of my special attention, please do let me know. Nothing trivial, please!

To ease us in gently, my first lecture, scheduled for some time next week, will concern the second law of thermodynamics, which states that everything tends inexorably to a state of increasing disorder, a concept that I suspect is already familiar to most dogs and their owners.  Perhaps, to prepare for the lecture, some of you might like to suggest an example or two where you have observed this law to apply in everyday life....

B. Bertie Boffin
The Brian Cox of the Dog Blogosphere.


  1. We must say Hamish would be very proud of you.

    Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Ruairi

    PS - from what we hear of Sir Hamish Bentley, he is doing great - and loves his new mommy.

  2. Well, I'm a bit at a loss for woofs here. Maybe my daddy or human brother, or even Alpha Mom would have a pertinent question or suggestion. Blog Mom and I just have to wait and see if we can understand the lessons when you give them.

    lotsa licks, Lola

  3. I am all ears. I love skool!


  4. Disorder! Why in heavens name would you think that applies to dogs and their owners?

    Bertie - Will you be going to Bellahouston Park for you walk on Thursday?

  5. Woof and nuzzle licks to my friend the Bertie-Boff...!

    I'm very new to this blogging thingy you know...Maxmom let me post today.... but I think I would like to be a 'thermodynamic' dog ...eventually ...And I think I am going to need school too. Thank goodness for Bertie Boff I might become a star student! As far as I think I am thinking...a thought... I think there is order in my chaos...indeed, they think there is chaos in my order...oh dear, it's all so confusing.

    But we can still be friends, right?

  6. Our little heads were spinning until we got to the part about "disorder," then we nodded in agreement. Still, I think I may have to copy Mango's homework.

    Your pal,

    Petey (and his easily flummoxed Mom)

  7. We are so so impressed with your proposed agenda for scientific learning. We must confess, however, that we stopped at your mention of "a dog's breakfast." The company our Dogdad works for, a 50-year old employee-owned engineering company is about to be acquired by a very large UK firm so we are learning proper British expressions. A dog's breakfast is one of the first that came up -- and, since ours is mostly same-old, same-old kibble, with an occasional dollop of pumpkin if we look bored enough -- we're kind of suspicious!

    Wirey love,

    Jake and Just Harry

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  9. Well done! We're all ears and Mum says she will be responding with some graphics to illustrate the vortex of disorder which accumulates, nay increases in size and velocity around our toy box.

    Hot damn! We love getting educated, especially if it involves treats!

    Love, Dozer and Cooper

  10. Crickey Bertie! My square noddle feels like it's going to implode (or is it explode?) after reading your bloggie.

    By the by was sent to the naughty corner after writing my comment yesterday. Cos I told a big porky pie. Haaaa!!! Something about being tardy (good scottish word there eh?) coming back when I've stolen food...like the tuna sandwiches or the KFC chicken twister. I can't see what's wrong with that can you? It's awfully bad form to eat on the run.

    But you wanted examples for your lecture. How about ANYTHING males of the human legged species get involved in or touches? Mom made me suggest that Bertie but I think she's right....

    Wiry love Uncle Eric xxx

    My pokes with the sharp thingie are going ok thanking you for asking, how's your perky earses? Still glued? They look smashing.

  11. Can we sit at the back of the class please.

    Molly, Taffy and Monty

  12. Blimmy Bertie, them are long words!! it all went a bit over me head, is it to do with the air up there!!
    I will be at your lession, may be a couple of pints might just help me brain cells to work
    See Yea George xxx

  13. Darling boy, Archie of course said he has a headache and might have to miss the class but I however am fascinated to hear what you have to say as of course you know I have several degrees in varying things(quantum physics being one of them) so if you need any help at all with your lectures(perhaps a video of me lecturing?) do let me know. Archie said that if you wanted something on disorder you have come to the right place. How about the time he ate the bag of brown sugar that fell off of the shelf and he got it all over the kitchen? Ohhhh we have a million of those disorderly stories.. love professor Agatha and her brother( hee hee chucling over the Boffin added to your name,,)

  14. Berti
    You are gonna What??? Zoom~~right over my head but hey!! I am up to learning!! Bring it on!!


  15. We were just about to route you to A & A's most recent blogpost. But we see they've already been here ... and didn't even mention it. Perhaps that example of a state of increasing disorder is a bit too common. Or mundane. (We're pretty sure Fergi could top it.)

    Anyhow. Our other point. Or, rather, question. You mentioned, "a striking example of nurture triumphing over nature." Are you suggesting that you, Bertie, lack the natural interest in things scientific? WE DON'T THINK SO! You are an example of a highly developed canis lupus familiaris veryspecialis. At least we think so.

    Your faithful followers
    Jake and Fergi

  16. Dearest Little Bertie,
    We really must stress that the natural order of things is for Gail to read books and for you to eat them!
    They are such fun to shred in ones younger years!
    The things you have to worry about are where you should hide your bones in the garden.
    How to get more treats from Gail.
    You will already have explored the 'disorder' theory and we agree it only takes a dog in ones life to see this particular theory in action.
    We insist Bertie that you go out to the garden today and dig holes - a sure way to investigate the theories of the universe!
    Your adoring Aunties xxxx

  17. Hello Bertie!

    My name is Oskar & I just found you through Mango & Dexter's blog.

    My mom person loves your breed, so we're going to follow you now!

    Stop by my bloggie & say hello sometime.

    Nubbin' wiggles,

  18. Hi Bertie,

    I'm looking forward to your lectures. My world at the moment consists of a really big and comfy kennel (that I share with my mum and dad) surrounded by some green stuff and vertical things at the edges. Of course I sometimes get outside all this (and not just in my rabbit chasing dreams), but when I do I feel this tuggy thing at my neck as I explore (unless I am running with the wind at the beach or a dog park and then I am so busy having fun I don't notice the world) so I know I'll enjoy reading your posts and learning from you about the really important stuff out there.