Saturday, 4 September 2010

Blue poo...

Oh you should be so grateful that Gail does not always take her camera when we go out for walks.

Today, instead, we shall set the scene with a picture of me posed nicely on some newly conquered territory in Gail's study.

Now are you sitting comfortably? And have you already eaten your breakfast?

Good. For today's post is not for those of a delicate constitution. Er, how to begin?

Well, you'll have noted the reference above to 'newly conquered territory'.  Thing is, Gail has recently decided to allow me into her study during the day. The idea is that I sit quietly beside her, providing restful companionship as she busies herself at the computer reading your blogs doing her work stuff.

Yes, you'll have spotted the flaw in that plan already. We fox terriers are not noted for our quiet and restful natures. Especially not six month old WFT's. Like the Spanish conquistadors, our instinct is to explore our New Worlds, and to plunder.

And there are SO many interesting places to investigate in this study. While Gail was away in the kitchen making a coffee, I had a good old rummage around behind a pile of papers and found this long blue wooden object. It tasted just great.

I really don't know why Gail got so cross when she came back saw me chomping away. You know how humans have this habit, so rude I think, of suddenly snatching things out of your mouth? NO NO Bertie, she said, and put the remnant stump in this old tin.

Later on, at the usual time, we went out for our afternoon walk. Now I don't know about you, but I am not too keen on using the jungle out the back our pleasant garden as a toilet, and prefer to hold it all in until we are walking down the street. (No Gail, I'm sure this isn't 'oversharing'; it is germane to the story).

Well half way down the road, I stopped and arched my back in the customary fashion while Gail rustled around in her pocket for a little plastic poo bag. My action, which is usually accompanied by extravagant praise and encouragement, this time elicited from Gail a shriek they must have heard in Dundee."OH MY GOD BERTIE IT'S BLUE".

Now as you know, Gail is a scientist and normally has a healthy curiosity about natural processes. But not, apparently, on this occasion.  I have no doubt that you too, like me, are wondering, was 'it' blue all the way through, or just on the surface?

And I am disappointed to have to tell you that we will never now know.

Mmmm. Time, I think, for a little snooze.


  1. Oh my poo for your mom to pick up? I am very glad your mom did not have her camera on hand because I don't think you'd want her to show THAT to the world! That would be embarrassing indeed!

  2. Bertie,

    We read your blog every day but have never commented before... until NOW! Blue poo! Way to go, man! In all our years, 6 and 5 respectively, we have never managed such a wondrous feat! Congratulations!

    Sam and Pippen

  3. Good going Bertie.Blue poo scores 9 out of 10. As an encore wait util the Christmas tree goes up and then munch on the baubles - that will really get Gail's blood pressure up. Trust us - we've done it.

  4. Hey there Bertie Boy....

    Blue poo happens once in a blue moon! :)

    I take it a new box of crayons is on the shopping list? Why not try another colour, Bertie. Mixing colours is always fun! :)
    Sending lotsaluv


  5. Not to worry, Bertie! I eat a pencil whenever I can find one, with not one bad result yet. She wouldn't mind if you chewed on a twig in the back yard, would she? Of course not. Wood is wood, I say. You hate to see your parent get so excited over minor things like this, but you'll get used to it. She probably won't!


  6. Lol Bertie, was it this new pavement art you were trying to do, you could make some money out of it!!!
    See Yea George xxxx
    PS love that photo of you on the chair, and you explained it that well, no photos where needed :)

  7. When I was a child, I had a dog who ate some of my crayons and then produced colored poop. I was so entranced by this that I fed him a few more colors. All in the interest of science, of course.

  8. Berti
    WOW!! Blue poop!! WTG!! The munchkins have these waxy things that they color with and well.....I cant rssist one on the floor. So I have an assortment of colors of poop too!! Mom is like ...OH JAzzi not again!! BOL


  9. Bella is always eating pencils, but alas, only leads. That was one pooh that should have been left there for all and sundry to admire!

    XXXOOO Daisy, Kendra & Bella

  10. OOhhh Gail, thanks so much for forgeting the camera!

    Bertie, ah, well, don't do that no more!

    Have a Great Weekend

    woo woos, Tessa

  11. OOhhh Gail, thanks so much for forgeting the camera!

    Bertie, ah, well, don't do that no more!

    Have a Great Weekend

    woo woos, Tessa

  12. HOO HOO HEE HEE HAA HAA HAA HAA I don't think we can leave a message..Archie is rolling on the floor with tears coming out of his eyes from crying / laughing too hard and I must say I am chortling a little.. Boy oh boy Bertie you could be our FASTEST pupil Archie says don't do this too too often cuz he has found the pencil can give you shall we say problems some times if too much is eaten and believe me he should know) Listen also about the chair conquest..WAY TO GO soon you will have it down to only one chair in the whole house you are not allowed on(which you go on when they are gone) Love your teachers A+A

  13. Blue Poo?

    I am lost in admiration :)
    MissyChief xx

  14. Dawling Bewtie
    What an achievement
    I ttink I speak fow all us squawe dogggies when I say "Well done Bewtie!!!!"
    You do look most handsome sitting in youw newly conquewed chaiw and I am vewy suwpwised that Gail had such an unoosual weaction to some bootifully colowed poop sheeesh hoomans awe so unpwedictable
    smoochie kisses

  15. Ah Bertie can you feel the breeze? S'me wigging my wagger off at your adventure. Sooper dooper blue poop!! Haaa well done my boy! Can't imagine why Gail was so...well....suprised. Doesn't she know we squares are of ROYAL decendancy, blue runs through our veins of course and sometimes our pooop too. What's wrong with that?

    TYaining Gail to allow you into her study , onto the chair and providing you with a blankie too....woohooo!! Hat Trick Bertie!!! Makes me proper proud. Tried for the bed yet? You can do it.....

    Square love my boy from your puffed up proud Uncle Eric xxx

  16. We just recently let Monty on the bed - big mistake!

    Hee-heee... blue poo...


  17. Bertie! What has you done with that little puppy who's blog this used to be?? You look very growed up! Ah, never mind about blue poo. Try eating some christmas tinsel and making it sparkley!

    You is right about rude humans, just today I settled down with a chocklit cake I found just sitting on the dining room table on a plate when it got snatched from under my nose!

    ~lickies, Ludo

    pee ess: No there nothing wet or weedy about liking school!

  18. Oh Bertie, you must not worry at all about the blue poo.
    You see you do have blue blood in your viens.
    Do you remember when Petey discovered that Bailey was in fact related to the royal family.
    So you see that explains the blue poo - we trust that Gail will be impressed.
    love and kisses
    You adoring aunties xxxx
    So sorry we are late dear but we have having difficulties this end with our blogging servant!

  19. ps we see that Eric has beat us to it with the royal blood but rest assured Bertie, it is on our side of the family, not his!

  20. Awesome! You can make blue poo from eating colored pencils? Mum has tons of colored pencils in her craft room. I'll get Coop to eat a bunch of red ones and really scare Mum!

    Love, Dozer

  21. We knew right away that you are a colorful chap, Bertie. And a very very cute one, too.

    So. Does Gail like wired fox terriers?

    Just wondering,
    Jake and Fergi
    (We've had green poo. Never blue.)

  22. I am surprised the blue poop detective mom did not take it home for further examination. Surely she does not see blue poo every day, right?

    Doubtful it is related to anything you might have consumed in the study. More likely a sign of neglect. Your sadness at being ignored whilst she alleges to do work needs to come out someplace.