Please help with my wardrobe dilemma!

Friends, I have a favour to ask of you today.

As you know, next month I am chaperoning Gail on a big trip to visit Renate and Michael, our friends in Germany.

We shall be travelling by train and ferry, and so, although not subject to airline luggage weight restrictions, Gail says we'll have to pack light as everything we need for the two week holiday must fit in her backpack.

As a result, my holiday wardrobe is to be restricted to two bandanas.

Obviously, I shall be wearing my personalised European Union flag neckerchief most of the time. But even the most pro-EU pup needs a change of attire every once in a while, and gosh I am having a dilemma trying to decide which one of my half dozen other bandanas to take along.

Please help me choose! I know you are thinking that these wee cotton squares weigh almost nothing and surely Gail could fit all six in her rucksack, but believe me, she can be very firm when it comes to such issues, and so I really do need to settle on just the one.

Oh and perhaps you could also tell me why you think a particular colour or design would be most suitable. I really would appreciate your input...

PS Gail says fretting over what to pack weeks in advance of departure is a sure sign I am now a 'senior' dog. I am not sure this is meant nicely! 

A Calcutta Cup Crisis!

Gail, the England versus Scotland rugby match is starting in half an hour and you have not yet found my Scotland flag bandana. This is terrible! I fear it will bring the Scotland team bad luck if I cannot make my support visible. Please look again, you must have put it somewhere.

Oh Bertie I am so sorry, I have searched high and low and I cannot find the Saltire pattern neckerchief anywhere. How about you put on one of your other bandanas?  They are all very smart. 

You are totally missing the point Gail! None of those bandanas is remotely fit for the occasion, quite obviously.

Well perhaps you're right Bertie. Oh but look what I've found in the clothing bag. Your pretty pink frock! For some reason you have not worn it lately. This is perfect for the rugby, don't you think? 

 Gail, you are teasing me, and it is SO NOT FUNNY. Look, here's my old tartan scarf. I guess I'll have to make do with that.

Now let's turn on the telly, so I can bark along with the anthem.

"O Flower of Scotland,
When will we see
Your like again,
That fought and died for,
Your wee bit Hill and Glen,
And stood against him,
Proud Edward's Army,
And sent him homeward,
Tae think again."

COME ON SCOTLAND!

Two hours later...

England 61 Scotland 21.
Oh dear. If only I been wearing the bandana...

Proudly Independent or Better Together?

Now it may just have escaped the attention of some of my far flung readers that there is a going to be a referendum in Scotland later this year. On the 18th of September, to be precise. The question is:

"Should Scotland be an independent country?"

Well I'm sure you are longing to hear my thoughts.

Hmmm.

Gail is warning me not to put my paw in it here.  Some neighbours who were previously good friends with each other have already fallen out over this contentious and emotive issue.

Of course, being a terrier, I am by nature attracted to the notion of independence. But then I am remembering Human Granny and Grandad down in England and I don't at all like to think they could become foreigners. And, you know what, we already have different laws about dogs in Scotland anyway (absolutely no tail docking, even of working dogs, for example).

Oh it is all very difficult.

I wonder which bandana suits me best?


And now Gail is saying it's all irrelevant 'cos dogs don't get to decide. Surely that can't be right? I mean I know for a fact that human sixteen year olds will be eligible to vote in the referendum, and I am most definitely more sensible and have better judgement than the average bipedal teenager…


I may return to this important topic in due course …

Absolutely not the thin end of the wedge

OK now I want to make things quite clear here. I agreed JUST THIS ONCE to wear a bandana to show my support for Scotland in their remaining Rugby World Cup fixtures.

This is not a precedent, the thin end of the wedge, the slippery slope to wearing a tutu, no sir!

But oh I am so excited about this rugby tournament. If fact I am quite prepared to fly out to New Zealand and offer my services to the Scotland team. I have been practicing my tackling and rucking and scrummaging skills on the back lawn and would be ready and willing to bite any opponent if required. What I lack in bulk and paw-to-eye co-ordination I make up for in spades with terrier attitude.

PS Gail assures me that the bandana doesn't look at all girlie. She is telling the truth isn't she? Don't laugh.

World Cup decision, and red bandana(?) day

Talk about pressure.

I think Gail's been reading too many dog books about how the human has to be the 'alpha' animal in the household. She's come over so bossy lately.

Not just this puppy class 'sit', 'lie down', 'paw', 'other paw', 'stay', 'come' stuff (all of which I can now do, by the way, well, apart perhaps from the 'stay' bit, and of course only when I choose.....)

No, it's been all Bertie you need to decide who to support in the football World Cup, Bertie it's not big and it's not clever to be anti-English after all who feeds you, Bertie I think you should take part in this red bandana day thing on www.portugueseblog.blogspot.com, Bertie just please try and be a bit more co-operative for once...

Well on Sunday night we had a long heart to heart as I lay cuddled up on Gail's lap, and, inspired by our new coalition government, agreed a compromise. I was planning to back South Africa in the World Cup, as Hamish had promised his dear friend MaxDog that he would and of course I want to honour their memory. The compromise is that I support England and South Africa. If they play each other, I am allowed to support South Africa.

So, the red bandana thing. We thought that I could wear an England flag bandana, red and white of course. I sent Gail out to the shops.

She came back hours later, having scoured Aberdeen for an England flag. She went on and on about how hard it was to find one, and how eventually she asked at the service desk at Sainsbury's and they produced a little packet from under the counter, wrapped in brown paper*.

Secretly I was relieved that it wasn't bandana sized. I don't do clothes, at least not yet (although come to think of it, a rainjacket would have been handy in the park this morning). But I did help Gail arrange the flag nicely on our sitting room floor, so this is my red 'too big to be a bandana' picture for the Porties event on 10th June.

Apparently I am lucky we don't have laws here in the UK about violating the flag.....

Oh, and England play the USA on Saturday, and I'll be posting about that too. Hope all my American friends will be watching! I should also say that MaxMom in South Africa has much more about the World Cup on her wonderful blog.

*OK, Gail says, I admit I made up the brown paper bit, but honestly, not the rest...