As you know, next month I am chaperoning Gail on a big trip to visit Renate and Michael, our friends in Germany.
We shall be travelling by train and ferry, and so, although not subject to airline luggage weight restrictions, Gail says we'll have to pack light as everything we need for the two week holiday must fit in her backpack.
As a result, my holiday wardrobe is to be restricted to two bandanas.
Obviously, I shall be wearing my personalised European Union flag neckerchief most of the time. But even the most pro-EU pup needs a change of attire every once in a while, and gosh I am having a dilemma trying to decide which one of my half dozen other bandanas to take along.
Please help me choose! I know you are thinking that these wee cotton squares weigh almost nothing and surely Gail could fit all six in her rucksack, but believe me, she can be very firm when it comes to such issues, and so I really do need to settle on just the one.
Oh and perhaps you could also tell me why you think a particular colour or design would be most suitable. I really would appreciate your input...
PS Gail says fretting over what to pack weeks in advance of departure is a sure sign I am now a 'senior' dog. I am not sure this is meant nicely!
Well no soon as I was sprung from prison than Gail was insisting on showing me all the photos from her bicycle tour across Wales.
I'm guessing it would be considered disloyal were I to admit that before long I was thinking I might be better off playing with my new friends in 'camp' after all. You know how it can be with someone else's holiday pictures, no matter how fond you are of that person, one can have too much of a good thing...
(And what's more, quelle surprise, there was the usual disappointing lack of 'welcome back' gifts.)
I am hoping that, having agreed to show you a small selection from Gail's photo gallery, avoiding too many distressing shots of lycra clad middle-aged backsides, then this will be end of it...
So it seems the trip started in Bristol (actually in England) where Gail was a student back in the Dark Ages. Before the ride began, Gail spent a nostalgic day revisiting old haunts, including the house in Montpelier where she lived for three years. Did you know that Montpelier, an inner city area of Bristol, was voted the UK's hippest neighbourhood in 2018?
Once in Wales, the group cycled along mile after mile of pretty lanes bordered by hedgerows laced with bluebells, stitchwort, red campion, buttercups and more...
And up and over hills, including the Gospel Pass and Bwlch y Groes, which Gail insists were a lot steeper than they look in the pictures...
Wales is famous for its castles large and small - those pictured below are in Caernarfon and Criccieth.
Wales is also famous for rain, but Gail tells me that, incredibly, apart from a few light showers one morning the weather was dry throughout.
She also says it was quite warm, although the evidence on this point is not entirely convincing...
And yes that is Gail, back right, taking a wee break with some of her companions on the approach to the seaside town of Portmadog, near the end of the trip.
Apparently Wales is great if you like: quiet roads, pretty scenery, castles, sheep, people speaking Welsh, cycling up hills, clean air...
And not so great if you like: breakfast options which include fresh fruit and a decent cup of coffee...
I should also report that since her return Gail has been rubbing her knees quite often and seems a bit less bouncy than usual after the effort of cycling up all those hills!
Oh and by the way, here is a reminder of what I look like, in case you had forgotten.
So this post is going to be all about Gail's recent holiday in the USA, and is the result of a painstakingly negotiated settlement whereby photos involving bicycles are balanced by dog and other animal related images.
Well let's get the boring biking bit out out of the way for starters.
Marse's dog Josh supervises the reassembly of Gail's bicycle
I had understood that Gail went to the USA to join her old friend Marse and a bunch of Marse's friends for an eight day bike ride around NW Montana.
Marse lives in Tacoma, WA. It seems she, Gail and the other riders drove all 450 miles from Tacoma to the start point in St Regis, Montana on Tuesday September 5. And all the way back again the next day... I, Bertie, think they were wimps to bottle out of the planned bicycle tour, just 'cos the route they'd planned, up to Glacier National Park, went right through the heart of an area of ferocious wildfires, and the whole state was blanketed in smoke so thick that people were being advised to staying indoors with windows closed and avoid all exertion...
Smoke covering Washington, Idaho and Montana
Gail had been looking forward to seeing all the Montana wildlife, but had to make to with this moose by the lake at Coeur d'Alene, Idaho.
Marse and Moose
Even in Tacoma, the parked vehicles were covered in ash, reminding folk of the 1980 Mount St Helens eruption.
So the bike group re-thought their plans and organised rides around the South Puget Sound area and in Mount Rainier National Park, where the air was relatively clear. Gail says she thinks they did this mostly for her benefit, feeling bad that she had travelled such a long way with her bicycle, only to have the main event cancelled.
One day they started from the Cascade Bike Club HQ in Seattle (Gail was awestruck by the facilities), and toured the campus of 'U-Dub' (aka the University of Washington).
Another day they rode up to Black Diamond for a hearty lunch.
Then came a visit to Harstine Island, where the ride ended with a barbecue at cyclist Bill's gorgeous holiday home.
Next, the bike group spent a few lovely days enjoying more hospitality at Jim and Lori's cosy cabin in Ashford, near Mount Rainier National Park.
From the cabin, one day they rode up the 3600 ft ascent to the appropriately named Paradise.
Later that same day, back at Jim and Lori's cabin, Gail was instructed in the essential American campfire ritual of making s'mores, the perfect follow-up to all that exertion on the bike.
Lori exhibits the perfect s'more
Another day they hiked up to High Rock lookout, where they disturbed the peace of a solitary young man and his handsome dog Champ.
And afterwards drove miles and miles along forest track to harvest Lori's secret huckleberry garden.
Returning to base in Tacoma, Marse had other things on her mind. It turns out that her dog Josh is something of an escapologist, and has recently taken to scaling her 4 ft high fence, and roaming the neighbourhood. I don't see why this is a problem, but for some reason Marse was intent on installing a DIY 'coyote roller'. This apparently involved fixing lengths of plastic tubing on top of the fence so that it rolls in such a way as to make it difficult for coyotes and/or dogs to clamber over.
Oh, just to confuse you, the dog pictured about is not Josh, but seventeen year old Liddie, who also used to exhibit Houdini-like traits, but now is a sedate, if still charmingly cheeky, senior lady.
Finally, here is some bird-related artwork by the shore in Tacoma, plus one more photo of Josh and Liddie, as by my reckoning, there is still an imbalance in favour of bike photos on this blog post...
OK, finally, finally. Gail insists on posting this video she shot at a beach party one fine evening early in her visit, where Marse's nieces Marena and Soroa provided a memorable musical interlude.
PS Next and future posts, I promise, will revert to being all about ME (Bertie).
You know, I am beginning to appreciate that new technology, although it enables me to write a blog and share my thoughts and opinions with the world, does have its drawbacks too.
So I was all ready to greet Gail with the sad face, the droopy tail and the tales of hardship when she returned from her holiday in all those unpronounceable places. The sort of looks which, one hopes, will make her think I had suffered greatly in her absence and thus guarantee extra treats and cuddles until the guilt wears off.
Imagine my horror then when Gail bounced in last night waving her smartphone and saying "Hey Bertie, looks like you had a fine old time with Yvonne and Neil while I was away on my bicycle tour. Wasn't it nice of Yvonne to text me pictures of you enjoying a family get-together last Saturday night?"
And then Gail not only had the temerity to show me some pictures of her holiday, but also to claim there was no room in her panniers to bring home a doggy bag.
Post ride refreshment near Bileca, Bosnia-Herzegovina
Meal at Hotel Diamant, Bileca
Mountain track impassable on bicycles, Montenegro
Ice creams at Danilovgrad, Montenegro
Hotel Kosta's, Podgorica, Montenegro (aka Fawlty Towers)
Power cut in Shkodër, Albania
Coastal landscape, Montenegro
Waiting for dinner at Hotel Splendido, Kotor, Montenegro
Traditional Bosnian meat feast! (In Dubrovnik)
And I'm now wondering, did they ever actually get onto their bicycles?
Friends, I shall be catching up with you all when Gail has finished washing all her smelly clothes etc...
First there was Hamish the Westie. Then there was Bouncing Bertie. Now we have new WFT puppy Nobby. Will he be Nice Nobby or Naughty Nobby? Watch this space!
