Monday 10 May 2021

A Convenient Excuse

I have heard people say that "a dog is a tie".
These are not dog lovers, obviously.  
Today I propose an alternative view,
And I hope you don't think me obtuse
When I state that a dog's a convenient excuse. 

When the person's a lark, and it's hours after dark,
And the party's gone on far too long,
And they hate to seem rude by departing too soon, 
They remember the dog that they've left all alone.
At such times, a dog's a convenient excuse. 

If the cycling club's due to ride all the day through,
But the forecast's for afternoon rain, 
Then why not join in until coffee, then say
That you need to turn back 'cos your dear pet's shut in.
Again, I contend that a dog's a convenient excuse. 
When family stresses make home life oppressive,
(We all know this happens sometimes),
The claim you can make, that the dog needs a walk,
Ignoring the fact he's on bed, fast asleep,
Demonstrates how a dog's a convenient excuse.

In long wakeful nights, when losing the fight 
Against intangible worries and strife.
A person's mind might focus on how short
A dear dog's life is, and other woes suppress.
And in this too, a dog's a convenient excuse. 

PS from Gail: This poem should, of course, include a 'dog ate my homework' verse, but my family never had a dog when I was a child, and anyway I was a diligent little swot who almost always handed her homework in on time! 


  1. we love that poem!!!!!! the mama had no nog either when it came to homework stuff, but she tried it with blaming it on her budgie... (it didn't work LOL)

  2. What a lovely gentle poem, perfectly expressing how useful a dog is! Aren't we lucky to have them.

  3. What a super poem Bertie!
    It's so true - we are a good excuse when our human is looking for one. I've heard mine say, on the phone, that she couldn't possibly leave me all on my own for that long.
    I must say that in the past year she has usually taken me most places with her, so I know I'm a lucky girl.

    Inca xx

  4. I do have to say that I once had to ring my daughter's teacher up at home to tell him that our new maremma puppy called Jasper did really destroy my then 11 year old daughter's camp homework book. I thing he did believe me.

  5. Hari OM
    ..and anyone who says a dog is a tie has never had a cat...

    That was a brilliant adjustment in p.o.v. Bertie lad. I do hope you are going along okay - saw something over at Ruby's about 'midnight movements'??? Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx
    (pee ess - let Gail know that it is indeed all three siblings on their way even as I type!)

  6. I have used all of our dogs as convenient excuses to get out of many things, one was a wedding I did not want to attend. and when Bob is in hospital, several times in past few years, I have to leave him there to take care of the dogs, except that is not an excuse. it is true... i get really upset when people say dogs or cats are a tie, if that is the way they feel they should not have either. I know a lot of people who go away for 3 days and leave cats home alone, i thik that is wrong. others that have cats, have people who come in 3 times a day to check on them, that is better. my friend makes a lot of extra cash spending week ends in homes with pets so people can take a couple days off without putting in a kennel. i am blathering on. sorry. the poem is really good.

  7. Oh Bertie and Gail we might have been known to use that very excuse many many times. However, I must admit, when one has a cat, who had his/her own loo with a view and who was purrfectly happy to be alone, we had to pick and chose the most appropriate times to use it.
    Which was meal times. No one wants to come home to a cat whose nose gets bent out of shape when their meal is late.
    I loved this
    Hugs cecilia

  8. We love that poem, Bertie. Our pawrents often use us as excuses to get out of doing things too.

  9. My mom has used that excuse more than once. Great poem, Bertie!

  10. That poem is perfect and so true! Our mom loves us so much that she often doesn't need the excuse, but is glad to use it anyway! thanks for giving our mom a smile today!

    Rosie and Redford

  11. What a wonderful poem, and I am pretty sure Mama has used a bunch of those excuses!

  12. See, we KNEW we had to be good for something:)

    Woos - Lightning, Misty, and Timber

  13. Very nice poem. My parents have done it a thousand times.

  14. Yuppers, we sure do come in handy! BOL!!!
    Loved the poem my furiend! And loooooves the handsome photo!
    Ruby ♥

  15. |Terrific poem, even if it was missing the The dog ate my Homework! And Bertie Photos are the best!