Friday, 25 October 2013

Wanted - some dog/godparents!

I expect you saw in the papers the photos of Prince George's christening earlier in the week.

And were you too not struck by the generous supply of godparents awarded to the wee royal laddie?

Seven at last count.

Gail is always telling me how fortunate she was in her parents' choices of her godparents. First there was HGD's older brother, Uncle Jack. How I would have loved to visit him. A delightful man, by all accounts, the more so, surely, because he owned and ran the village butchers shop in Hartfield, Sussex. A butchers shop! Imagine! Then there was wealthy Great Aunty Dot, who lived in Leicestershire in a house with two staircases and a billiard room, and kept a poodle and an alsatian, plus various cats and horses. Thirdly, Doris in Lucerne, strong, independent-minded and generous, the lady Gail once described to a colleague as a role model (to which the colleague responded "that's a Swiss roll model then?")

Uncle Jack c.1996

Doris in 2005
So anyway, it occurred to me that never once has Gail mentioned any godparents for yours truly.

Surely it is not too late?

Perhaps some of my blog friends would like to apply for the post. In which case, let me specify some of the traits I would be looking for in a doggodparent. They should:
  • Live in an attractive part of the world where dog-friendly trails are plentiful.
  • Be hospitable to boisterous visitors.
  • Have loads of free time and the desire to spend it with a bouncy WFT.
  • Possess a moth-free wallet, and an in-depth knowledge of local pet treat suppliers.
  • Be relaxed about the animals on furniture issue, bearing in mind a favourite quote from Doris. "We own the house, the house doesn't own us".
  • Enjoy cuddles, laughs and adventures.
Taking a flexible approach to the 'god' aspect of godparenting, the position(s) are open to those of all religions and none, although, given my 'Blogville Boffin' status, I think I would have to draw the line at a Creationist.

Applications can be made via comments on this blog.


  1. Sorry, we don't even know anyone that would fit on your list. A butcher great would that be???!!!

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

  2. Hari Om
    Dear Bertie Boffin
    It is with some degree of bashfulness that I tender application for the post of Godparent as advertised. Why?
    a) I have long been an advocate of 'dog' being 'God' in reverse
    b) I am 'aunty' to half the known universe and have considerable dog-wrangling (ahem) handling experience
    c) I Love you with the capital 'ell' - - okay so I Love all the said part of Universe plus the other half and the bit not yet discovered, but that's the point. The Capital "ell" version of Love is - - - - Universal...8~)

    As to your specific guidelines: about to relocate to exactly such a place (property yet to be discovered - adventure you see)
    ...of course! But as an experienced aunty, you should be warned that there is an 'envelope' that will not be pushed
    ...timetabling yet to be established, but will take this factor under consideration
    ...all efforts will be made to ascertain whereabouts and availabilities
    ...what furniture? You're expecting furniture?...
    ...yayyayaayyayayayyyaaaayyayayaaaayy - that's the best bit!

    Creation??!! As an Advaitic Vedantin, the ultimate truth is it's all our fault because not only dogs, but everything is "God". The rising interest in String Theory is the closest thing science has to describe the philosophy of which I speak.

    Talking of science - who do you suppose ate the 'cream' out of the Torridonian Rock Cake then?? Or do you blame Quantum Mechanics?

    With that, I shall close this (as it turns out less than bashful) application with this concluding thought; I shall be in Bonny Alba by Christmas and am open to receiving orders for home-baked liver cakes. Oh yes I am...

    &*> Hugs and wags as always, YAM-aunty xxx

  3. A godfather who owns a butchers shop sounds like a pretty good deal ! Would Bertie have been given sausages every day ?

    1. Bertie might have had to fight me for home-made sausages fresh from the sausage machine round the back of the shop (and flavoured with herbs from the kitchen garden). Gail.

  4. You have a fine point there Bertie. I don't have any godparents either. We concur with your list. Good luck and we hope you have lots of applicants. Have a fabulous Friday.
    Best wishes Molly

  5. I am lucky Bertie...I have two godparents, Auntie Beth and Uncle Mike and I do visit them often as they live close by...No butcher shop, but they usually have the grill going and treats are abundant...Momz sez if you want a Florida godmum she is willing...Visits might be scarce but we have lots of great trails and she's a pretty loose hand with the cookies

  6. I will offer the Muzzer and Dad as godparents, if you will respond in kind with Gail as a godparent for at least one of us. We live in a lovely part of the US, Our current home state has wonderful walkable mountains, proximity to the centre of government (oops, maybe not so good?) our own home county, where there is a lovely river less than a mile from our front door and lots of good walkies, and a seaside! If Gail wants to visit rocks, there is our old home territory out in Arizona, and the surrounding states.

    We have a strict policy here that says "no humans on the furniture without permission" and an open refrigerator door policy. However, the only things we can reach are the veggies and fruits. Our Muzzer in pawtcular is most responsive to terrier smiles and wiles.

    No Butcher Shop, the closest "real" one being about eight blocks away. Lots of sqrrrrls and voles and small rodents. One or two opossums and raccoons, and an occassional deer. Five walkies per day. The last one is really not much more than five minutes, but some last half an hour or more.

    Please consider our humble application

    Gus and Teka

  7. Well that sounds like just like our mom! You know we go to the very best parks......we love exploring. Mom will only go on vacation to places that allow us to go with her. We visit our pet stores every week and we get to go in and choose our own treats. Mom doesn't care if we climb on the furniture and there are big fluffy dog beds scattered throughout the house. We also have a huge fenced in back yard and a doggie door so we can go in and out as we please. Best of all mom loves cuddles and there isn't anything she wouldn't do for us. Makes her the perfect number one god parent we think.

  8. Love that quote... We own the HOUSE... it does not OWN US.
    Looks as though you will have some applications to review... Be sure to clean your glasses before you begin...

  9. My mom and dad have proven themselves to be very good dog parents, so perhaps they would suit your criteria for god parents.
    Live in an attractive part of the world where dog-friendly trails are plentiful.This may be a bit problematic, because where we live is FLAT. But we do have beaches and fun places to walk.
    Be hospitable to boisterous visitors.Absolutely.
    Have loads of free time and the desire to spend it with a bouncy WFT. Mom is here most all days because she works from home, and she LOVES to spend it with me (and my brother before).
    Possess a moth-free wallet, and an in-depth knowledge of local pet treat suppliers. Uh, these two may be self-contradictory as moth-free wallet may grow moths if too often opened for pet treats. But we never have suffered.
    Be relaxed about the animals on furniture issue, bearing in mind a favourite quote from Doris. "We own the house, the house doesn't own us". All furniture is OURS. No problem!
    Enjoy cuddles, laughs and adventures. Absolutely. And squeaky toys and important lessons about life.

    So, what say you, Bertie???

    Your wirey pal,

    Just Harry

  10. Momma would be happy to be your godparent. You could come visit us then and stay on the furniture ALL you want.

  11. Hello Bertie: You want a god-parent, hmmm? My Mum will be happy to apply. The first thing she would do is write your Mum and get guidelines as to how you are being raised now, in your home, and follow them to the letter here at ours. No changes whatsoever.

    Heh,heh, I can't wait for your first winter in Minnesota!



  12. We can see that you easily have good candidates to choose from so it got us thinking that maybe we could take any left over good parents since we don't have any either! Thanks for coming by our bloggy and supporting my position on costumes!

    Your Pals,

    Murphy and Stanley

  13. Oops, we already have good parents but not god parents.


  14. Oh Bertie, we can be your godparents. We have all of those qualifications and think of the fun we could have together!!


  15. Of course, you would have to put up with miss Bossy pants!! BOL but on the flip we could gang up on her Yay!!


  16. Hullo Bertie....while we are probably too far away to apply for the god-dog parent position....we believe every doggie should have a legal god/dog parent in the event something happens to your real dog parents. Our human sissie will take care of us if anything happens to HER and the Mr. at the same time. She has a huge fenced back yard with lots of tree rats to chase, other doggies and several in your face kitties that aren't the least bit worried about any silly Scottie dogs. The peeps have sat aside funds in a trust for our continuing care, treats, toys, grooming and vet care.
    Bonnie n Kenzie The wee Scottie girls

  17. MOL MOL Bertie...I don't have any God parent's either.
    Mom and I would love to be your God parent's. Good news is being a cat...I already have Mom trained she loves having pets on the furniture and I'll teach you how to counter surf.
    Hugs Madi your BFFF

  18. Bertie,

    I would love to be your doggy godmother. I think I qualify on most counts:

    - Live in an attractive part of the world where dog-friendly trails are plentiful: check!
    - Be hospitable to boisterous visitors: yes, definitely so in your case :)
    - Have loads of free time and the desire to spend it with a bouncy WFT: I don't have much free time, but you would be game for most of my activities!
    - Possess a moth-free wallet, and an in-depth knowledge of local pet treat suppliers: ok, we do have a problem here; I hope it's not a blocking condition.
    - Be relaxed about the animals on furniture issue: are you kidding me? I own the fur-niture!
    - Enjoy cuddles, laughs and adventures: check!

    BTW: if you're looking for a human godparent, my mom and Dachshund Daddy also meet the criteria above (with the exception of the moth-free wallet in DD's case).

  19. I fur-got to mention the following selling points:

    - Like Doris, I'm also based in Switzerland, so you'd get some continuity if you picked me (or my parents);

    - You would NOT need to worry about creationism in our house, although DD is a bit concerned about certain issues that Lord Darwin may not have anticipated (the fact that those who do not believe in evolution tend to have more children than those who do).

    I only have one condition: when you come visit me, please bring your wotten waven bag of toys!

  20. We would be honored that our peeps could be your Godparents.

    - you could come and live with us on our acreage and all the farm animals around us.

    - our peeps do anything to keep us healthy and love us to no end, they love puppers

    - the house is ours by the Scottie Property Laws and the furniture is all ours!

    The Mad Scots

  21. I am surprised that none of the royal corgis were present to act as dogparents to the wee prince. Momma has offered her services in the role of dogparent with the added bonus that there are mice in the attic for your hunting pleasure.


    P.S. If you can learn to shoo away woodpeckers you can come right over the pond today.

  22. Bertie, reading all these comments above, I think you're going to have a hard time picking a godparent!
    Eve is urging me not to apply, because she says I would just make a fool of myself again and not set an awfully good example every time I encountered you. Anyways, you're older than I am, so it would be a case of godchild (you) setting godparent (me) an example!
    I'm sure whichever dog parent you pick, they will be great!
    Pippa :)

  23. Morning Bertie, come on over I have sent you an award. Keep safe in the hurricane tonight.

  24. Those were some pretty impressive resume's Bertie. We're sure you'll pick the right godparents.

    Muffin and I both have Godparents and it's wonderful! It means extra treats and toys.

    Lily Belle

  25. We don't have godparents, our Lady didn't either. We think we are missing out. Hope you find a great one. Lee and Phod

  26. THIS is EXACTLY why we badger OurMoma about never blogging any more. LOOK at what we are missing! We've no doubt that we could be PERFECT doggodparents ... but that assumes a relationship that's enjoyed more often than once every few months. HRMMPH! We are sighing ... thinking of all the Colorado trails and mountains in our backyard, the fact that OurMoma has already met you and fallen in love (she never used the word boisterous to describe your behavior!), the realization that ... so long as you like the company of a Gramma who might sorta forget who you are but invariably spoon feeds us those lunches that she'd rather not be eating ... time is abundant. Like 24/7. And about those pet treats. Who needs them? We get Gramma's sneaky handouts ... today it was hard salami and potato soup ... on a spoon. We've also got deer antlers and bunnies and voles right out our door (AND, admittedly, gobs of good treats from Chuck and Don's). How could you turn us down? Cuddles. Laughs. And adventures? They are more than abundant here. Every moment is a new experience. If you get our drift. But no. We aren't eligible ... 'cause OurMoma is too negligent to keep you up-to-date on our blog. It's been months. Maybe even years. HRMPHHH!

    Jake and Fergi

  27. Oh dear mom would LOVE to be your godparent due to her obsession with wire foxed terriers and the fact that she will likely never own one, pugs are more in keeping with her life style. However, we do not live in an atractive part of the world, although we are a short walk from some nice areas but our actual block, ugh. Also there is a limit of hiking trails unless you cant walking about the big city. The one thing we do have though is a totally relaxed attitude via dogs on furniture, its FUR niture after all

    urban hounds