Can you believe that Gail has been doubting my swimming ability?
Just because, when I encounter a river, a loch or the sea, I act prudently and choose to keep four paws firmly planted on terra firma.
It is perhaps not so surprising that Gail decided to "conduct an experiment".
So, on Sunday afternoon, the mini heat wave still being enjoyed across the land, I was driven out to Potarch Bridge, a favourite picnic spot on the river Dee.
I was happily scrounging for food and entertaining everyone with my mellifluous voice while Gail went into the river for a swim. After a few minutes of trying but failing to swim upstream against the strong current, she returned to dry land to find me. Her friend Yvonne recorded the subsequent shocking events.
Yes, I was picked up, carried under Gail's arm a few paces into the river, to where the water was quite a bit deeper than I am tall.
Well of course I doggy paddled right back to the river bank faster than you could bark "Rebecca Adlington".
Really, the cheek of it. Look at me, my furs all bedraggled.
How does one go about applying for a new owner?
PS The blog will be quiet for the next week as I am going down to Nottingham with Gail to check up on the human grandparents.