Friends, I have a question for you.
It is customary, is it not, when one's name and picture are featured prominently on the invitation, that one is actually allowed to attend the party?!
Another question.
Since when was an enthusiastic and affectionate greeting a crime punishable by solitary confinement?
Oh, and another thing.
Where did it say 'humans only' on the invite?
So all my neighbourhood friends (next door's springer spaniel Molly, dinky little Daisy the yorkie, Mackay the black lab and handsome flat-coated retriever Jake from across the road, plus puppy Harry schnauzer, Border terrier Bonnie and wee 'apricot' poodle Jack, who all live down the bottom of the street, and finally Bunty whom we have met previously and who stays just quarter of a mile away), all of them were heartlessly abandoned on Sunday night as their humans were merrily knocking back copious quantities of mulled wine and scoffing mince pies in MY KITCHEN.
And I was imprisoned without due process in the unheated back room.
Seasonal cheer? I think not.
Bah humbug.
PS from Gail: I would like to point out that is is a grossly inaccurate account of events on Sunday. Bertie was only 'confined' in the back room for a short period on grounds of over-exuberance in the presence of nervous toddlers. He then spent the rest of the evening thoroughly enjoying being carried around, patted on the head and generally fussed over to a quite absurd degree...
Amnesty International Aberdeen Group
Bertie - This has discrimination written in large letters right across it. I'd make sure that you gert an extra helping of turkey, gravy and potatoes on Saturday.
ReplyDeleteAn absolute travesty of justice, buddy Bertie! Eish, you're having it rough!!!
ReplyDeleteLicks
TOBY IN SOUTH AFRICA
An absolute travesty of justice, buddy Bertie! Eish, you're having it rough!!!
ReplyDeleteLicks
TOBY IN SOUTH AFRICA
Who was throwing dis shindig -- CATS??!!
ReplyDeleteYou was robbed my friend.
Oh yes. You was robbed!!
Big slurps, HoneyBuzz
There's only one thing to do, Bertie.
ReplyDeleteAny terrier worth their salt is an expert... you have to SULK big time and make Gail feel so guilty you get lots of treats.
Give her the big brown eyes look and then sigh and turn your back on her. SULK.. big time. Milk it for every treat you can :)
I vote for detroying something!
ReplyDeleteThat'll show them!
Refusing to eat always upsets my humans. Not all doggies can do that, but if you can then turning down food with a hangdog look (excuse the expression)will probably send Gail into a paroxysm of guilt. Almost as satisfying as kibble.
ReplyDeletelotsa licks, Lola
Sure, Miss I am being mean to wonderful Bertie who would never ever knock down a toddler (whatever that is). Sounds like a bit of rewriting history. Obviously this was a collective plot to abandon the furries in the neighborhood for what purpose is unclear. You poor little dear.
ReplyDeleteSlobbers,
mango
Oh you poor wee boy.
ReplyDeleteThis is awful.........we are quite speechless.
Molly, Taffy and Monty
We think a special hearing of the international court should be held.
ReplyDeleteHumans do strange things under the influence of wine -- mulled or not -- so we think their motives should be brought to light. We also think all your abandoned friends should be called as witnesses.
And, since we share your terrier DNA, we must say that an abundance of enthusiasm when welcoming guests is to be praised, not, as we are also subjected to, scolding or confinement.
We'd be happy to attend the hearing except for certain apparent limitations on air, rail, and road travel in certain parts of the world.
Wirey love,
Jake and Just Harry
Bertie - We believe you. These humans are always trying to pretend that all of the woes heaped on us are nothing. We actually had to get off the couch this morning to say hello to the Fed Ex guy. Can you believe the horrors?
ReplyDeleteOh my Bertie! We are calling the authorities. They tease us with pie smells then no invite? Brtual
ReplyDeleteBenny & Lily
Oh, Bertie!
ReplyDeleteI have spent some time with a year old Pom and believe me, like you, he always winds up in trouble! Its like you can only handle so much good behavior and then you get naughty. Part of your babyhood, I guess, still quite immature.
Cheers and Merry Christmas to you both! Don't bite Santa, Bertie!
Kisses,
Stella
Bertie darling...
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, we thought mince pies were your Uncle Eric's eyes...but don't get us started on that darn rhymin' slang...
Now, we know that the little tree next to you on that invitation was NOT made outta your stipped furs, BUT IT SORTA LOOKS LIKE IT....
As for toddlers...
I'D SO EAT THEM. Mumsie's getting a tad worried cuz there's bound to be those grandchildren things around here soon...she said she'll place them in OUR crates for safety. Sheesch...
Merry Christmas, dear boy!!
Love and Mistletoe KISSES,
Lacie Teacakes
False advertising if nothing else! This calls for major treats. If wikileaks gets ahold of this, watch out Gail.
ReplyDeleteXXXOOO Daisy, Kendra & Bella
Ha Bertie, you're busted! We believe Gail.
ReplyDeleteAlanis & Miro Airedale
Bertie, poor your even if it was for a short time, like Gail has pointed out.
ReplyDeleteIts up to the kids to learn how to behave around us dogs, not you my dear friend.
Now make sure you get an IOU from Gail it can be anything, but to my mine me she owns you one ;)
Have a Great Christmas hopfully not in the back room
See Yea George xxx
Bertie,
ReplyDeleteYou might have to put your case forward to "Paw Justice" (an actual NZ organization that fights for the rights of animals against abuse and neglect) or whatever the Scottish equivalent is, but considering how well Gail treats you for the rest of the year (and her side of the story) I'm not sure how your case would go. I think the best outcome from this experience that you can hope for is some extra turkey for your Christmas dinner.
Woofs,
Riley
Enjoy your holidays all!
ReplyDeleteWish we could have been there - it sounds like fun!
ReplyDeleteSam
Bertie,
ReplyDeleteHenry and Rosie have some advice for you from across the miles....a good old sulk will bring Gail to her senses and may even bring on more treats due to the guilt factor...it has worked wonders for us. Merry Christmas
Bertie, if overexhuberance were a crime punishable by solitary confinement, we'd all be cold and lonely. Can't help ourselves. It's the way we are. However, I have noticed that folks tend to lose perspective when toddlers are around, so we have to occasionally forgive them for locking us away. Glad it didn't last too long, though, and you got lots of hugs afterwards.
ReplyDeleteHave a very Merry Christmas!
William Tell & Co.
Bertie my boy. I believe your version. Can't understand what Gail was in such a tizz woz ... I mean how many toddlers can a wired foxy boy devour in just a couple of hours???
ReplyDeleteWiry love, Uncle Eric xxx
SHOCKING and whose version do you think we believe???WHY YOURS OF COURSE....LOCKED IN A CLOSET.....UNHEATED????? Don't worry little buddy we are working on this... Love A+A
ReplyDeleteDear Bertie and Gail,
ReplyDeleteAh Bertie, I sure hope that Santa Paws did not hear that tall tale!!!
From my family to yours...
We Wish you.... Very Merry Christmas.
and a
Happy New Year!
woo woos, Tessa
Oh Bertie!! That's terrible. How could they do such a thing to you...you should have round up all the other abandoned doggies and crashed that party!
ReplyDeleteHey Bertie bud...what's up?
ReplyDeleteYou haven't blogged for a week now, but I presume the Christmas spirit has taken it's toll?! Go easy on the whiskey now big boy!!!
Tell Gail that the party is only just beginning.
Sending lotsaluv
MAXMOM AND TOBY IN SOUTH AFRICA
We're just catching up after being away over Christmas. We're shocked, shocked! to read of the abuse heaped upon you, compounded by the fact that you were a NAMED host of the event! Obviously the adult humans should have brought their dogs and left the toddlers at home. We hope Gail made it up to you at Christmas.
ReplyDeleteJed & Abby