So. I have this new neighbour, Bunty. She's a border terrier, just twelve weeks old, and she came round to visit yesterday afternoon.
Well of course I bounced up to greet her with my customary enthusiasm. But she didn't seem to like that at all.
It was all "ooh I'm ever so timid, I just want to be with my Mummy, Mummy please stop that huge beast from jumping all over me, look at me, I'm so cute, with my big brown eyes and slightly trembling fluffy wee body, Mummy I need protecting, please make him go away".
I thought Gail might have sprung to my defence, but no such luck, and I was unceremoniously booted outside while darling Bunty held court in the kitchen.
Eventually, after loud and lengthy protests I was allowed back in and resumed my rightful place on Gail's lap, held tightly (Gail can be surprisingly affectionate at times), as Bunty roamed free.
Well, you won't believe what happened next....
Bunty, suddenly all bold as brass, went and ate MY DINNER!!!!
The little minx!
I was so flabbergasted I could only look on in mute horror.
Lest anyone imagine that this story casts some doubt on my masculinity, I refer you to the picture at the top of this post, in which I am demonstrating my latest accomplishment.