Gail, I haven't talked to anyone about this 'cos it's a bit of a sensitive issue, but now that we're alone together, back in Aberdeen, can I have a word with you about, you know, er, girls?
Girls, Bertie?
Well actually, one girl in particular, I mean Izzy.
Izzy the poodle, who lives with my brother and his family? It was fun meeting them all on Boxing Day wasn't it?
Oh isn't Izzy just the most adorable creature? So tall and long-limbed, graceful, soft and gentle....
Well yes Bertie I think she's nice too (although perhaps a surprising choice of dog for a family where the menfolk had previously only been interested in playing rugby...)
I can't see anything surprising at all! She has such a beautiful, shapely, rear end, it smells lovely, and that pom-pom on her tail is most impressive isn't it?
Er, yes, Bertie, if you say so...
But Gail, I don't think Izzy even noticed me. And I'm wondering, could you perhaps fashion my tail into a pom-pom like Izzy's, I think that might catch her eye?
GAIL, DON'T LAUGH, I'M NOT BEING RIDICULOUS! OH IT'S SO NOT FAIR. NO-ONE UNDERSTANDS ME. AND DON'T JUST SAY I'M AT A DIFFICULT AGE!
Now Bertie, you come here and have a cuddle. That's better. Bertie, I am truly delighted that you like Izzy. I'm afraid that Hamish didn't have much time for her at all. But it might be a while before we see her again as she lives in Sheffield, nearly 400 miles away. So I'll tell you what, how about we go down for a run on the city beach? Exercise and bracing North Sea air is what you need just now, my dear laddie! The beach? OK. Come on then! What are we waiting for?
Well Gail, on reflection, maybe the pom-pom wasn't such a great idea after all. I guess other dogs in Aberdeen might have laughed at me too ....
Oh Bertie
ReplyDeleteI would stay away from the pom pom. lol Izzy was very pretty though. You have your own "Special" look to you and you sure dont want to change that right?? You are way to darn cute just as you are!!
wags
Jazzi
Don't change for anyone Bertie....enjoy that beach.
ReplyDeleteXXXOOO Daisy, kendra & Bella
Bertie dear, I think you is pawfect just the way you is. I think maybe you just need to take another look in da mirror. You will be most impressed!!
ReplyDeleteBig slurps, HoneyBuzz
Bertie,
ReplyDeleteTake it from the Mango. Those aloof gals take a firm paw. You need to develop your love song and if that doesn't work, do like me, just hump, oh yeah.
But please be sure the gal doesn't wander off whilst you are doing your man dance or you will find yourself air humping which is kind of embarrassing.
Slobbers,
Mango
Thank goodness for that, you poo pooed the idea. Your a terrier and as such should be proud of your rugged looks ;)
ReplyDeleteSee Yea George xxx
PS nice beech
Oh Bertie, we can see why you were so taken with Izzy - she is quite beautiful.
ReplyDeleteIn fact we have decided to book into a beauty parlour ourselves having seen her!
She does seem older and more sophisticated than you Bertie although it is not uncommon for younger dogs to lose their hearts to older female dogs!
We must say that beagle you met on the beach looked more the kinda doggie with common interests!
We can't see Izzy enjoying the brisk air of an Aberdeen beach somehow!
Can we just mention how very handsome you look in that first pic of you on the beach!
Lovely stance dear.
Much love
Your adoring Aunties xxxx
ps our word verification is Mango!!!
Oh Young Bertie,
ReplyDeleteWhile Izzy is very lovely, we think a terrier, such as yourself, could find a beautiful terrier girl who will make your swoon (and a few other things that we won't mention - you'll know when they happen.) No pom pom for you, laddie.
XOXO
Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Ruairi
You've got to be you, Bertie, you is a fine thing to be. I do understand how you feel. I fell hard for a Border collie mix who has visited us a couple of times. He was friendly, but I don't think he was taken the way I was. But Gail is right. My friend lives about 200 miles away and we just don't see each other often enough for real romance, alas. You'd be better off to look around closer to home.
ReplyDeletelotsa licks, Lola
Bertie - All Scots laddies fall for poodles. It's their continental air. Some folk would say it's also how the auld alliance started.
ReplyDeleteOh Bertie, Everyone seems to have it all just right for you. Izzy Is a long way away, but sometimes those romances are quite nice. You can keep in touch via e-mail and send the now and then gift. The boy I love is about the same distance away from me that Izzy is from you. He sends me songs in the mail and we think about each other often. Its a sweet feeling knowing that he cares about me and I about him.
ReplyDeleteSo don't give up on distance!
Kisses,
Stella
You know, Bertie, those poodles aren't all just fluff! They are amazing hunting doggies. And those funny haircuts? The hair was kept thicker around their joints so they stay warm while hunting! They are amazing swimmers and athletes! Just sayin'. She's not such a bad choice...And Stella's right. There's something to be said about the long-distance ahem, furiendship...
ReplyDeleteWe say while you're young meet as many girls as you can!!
Couldn't your Mum just attach a "pretend" pom pom so you could take it for a test drive?
ReplyDeleteWe love the sea pictures! Whoo hoo!
Sweet BEwtie,
ReplyDeleteI think Izzy is twooly a bootiful giwl and maybe she's just being shy wif you. I bet on that lovely beach of youws you'll find many gowgeous giwls who will fall madly in love wif you. I'm glad you didn't do a pom pom on youw tail..while it's pawfect on Izzy, I think youws is weally pawfect as is.
smoochie kisses
ASTA
I think your tail looks pawfect just the way it is. As mine was cut off, without my people's knowledge, when I was 1 day old, I'm quite jealouse of your tail!
ReplyDeleteNubbin wiggles,
Oskar
Love your heart, you are pawfect just as you are Bertie. Pom pom less!
ReplyDeleteBertie, the "teen" year is for trying on and discarding new personalities. But the rottrovers are quite correct: never underestimate the steel inside a poodle, especially a standard poodle. You're much too young to settle down yet. And remember, "to thine ownself be true." So no fake tails. What if she liked it and you had to glue one on for the rest of your life? Much better to find a lady who likes you for YOU.
ReplyDeleteJed & Abby
Oh Bertie, I think that old pup with the ball on her tail is too old for you!
ReplyDeleteI think that you will find the right girl soon. You are such a handsome fellow. Such beautiful colors, rich black and such a soft brown on your lovely face. The beautiful white on your pawsome mouth and such studley hind legs too!
Oh my, I think that it's getting hot in here. Ah, well, Bertie I sure wish I lived close to you.
You sure would forget about that ugly old poodle!
woo wind woo woo, Tessa the YOUNG Maltese!
Oh Bertie, Those french chicks can be so aloof. Whatever you do don't get anything pierced or tattooed.
ReplyDelete