Some of my friends, I know, have to compete for attention with other dogs. We have all been reading with great interest about the dreadful situation that Scottie Jazzi has recently endured with newcomer Addy... Other friends have, heaven forbid, to share their living space with diverse species: cats, rabbits, hamsters etc.
I have a different problem, which I want to share with you today.
My main rival for Gail's affections is an inanimate object with two wheels. Actually she owns three of these contraptions, but it's the one pictured here that I most resent. This bicycle came out of the shed a few weeks ago, and Gail keeps disappearing on it for hours at a time on what she refers to as 'a training ride'. (Different from a ride on a train, apparently).
It gets worse.
I asked Gail how we are planning to celebrate what my American pals call my 'gotcha day', the anniversary of day when I first came to live here in this house. It's coming up in a couple of weeks. Can you believe what I was told?
"Tough luck Bertie, I shall be on a bicycling trip in France with my London-based friends for that week, and you will be in
Are there not laws against this sort of treatment?