Friday, 23 June 2017

Can a dog issue a fatwa?

This all came about 'cos I overheard Gail say she was a wee bit embarrassed at having to give a presentation to some Iranian clients while her face was still all bruised and grazed from last Saturday's bicycle accident.

She mentioned she'd recently read an article in the paper about women being banned from cycling in Iran.

Gosh it seem to me these Mulllah types are onto something here.

Long time readers of this blog will be aware of all my trials and tribulations surrounding Gail's passion for two wheeled transport and exercise.

I had no idea that one could simply issue a decree stating that females are just not allowed to ride bikes. Problem solved!

Come to think of it, maybe we could extend the ban to human males too. Especially the sweaty mid-life crisis types that wear unwise lycra and often nearly run one over in the park of a morning.

Of course I would make allowances for those folks riding bicycles with baskets, trailers or other adaptations to enable transport of one's pet.

Oh, it seems that you only get to issue these decrees if you are some kind of a high heid yin of the Muslim faith.

So where do I sign up for Ayatollah School?

PS Gail apologises to her Muslim friends for any offence caused by Bertie's sketchy theological understanding...


  1. Bertie I'm with you... a bike-free area would be great... specially now in summer we have too much peeps on bikes ;o)

  2. Perhaps banning women from cycling UNLESS chaperoned by a dog.

  3. Bertie, that's sexist ! We have kilometres of special bike lanes in the nearest town to where I live, and no one ever uses them - they all stay on the road. It's a huge bone of contention for the locals about the absurd waste of money spent to paint them.
    However, I do feel sorry for all those Muslim ladies who enjoy riding their bikes, they have little enough freedom as it is.

    Inca xx

  4. BOL BOL! At least momma's bike has a basket for pups.

  5. We agrees wiff ya bout dose fat dudes in da spandex pretendin' dey's Lance Armstrong or sumthin'.... we feel bout dat like we duz dudes in Speedos.... unless ya gots da bod, wear sumthin' less form-fittin'... It's part of our Keep America beeyoutifull campaign..

  6. Bertie I think you are referring to MAMILs. Middle aged men in lycra.Surely you do not put the lovely Gail in the same category as the MAMILS

  7. Hari OM
    OMD Bertie lad... it was on the tip of my fingers the other night to warn Gail that you might be looking to ban cycling once you saw her injuries... not at all knowing about this infringement of rights for our sisters in Iran! I do think that you have an argument for encouraging the adoption of a basket or trailer so that you can go along and keep her on the straight and narrow though... hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

  8. Love you Bertie. Our Gus was not very "P. C." either.

  9. Mum finks the bikers are more dangerous than the cars in London....or is it that she just doesn't pay enuff attention?????
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

  10. Oh dear. We are strong advocates of the dog in a basket/trailer while one cycles, but if you had been along, you might have been seriously injured. Perhaps one should consider the tricycle type of bike to prevent future falls? Those usually come with a pup size basket included. Or consider a face guard?
    Bonnie n Kenzie

  11. Maybe if those women fall they won't get hurt cause of all the clothes they have on
    Lily & Edward

  12. You sure make a great point Bertie!
    Arty & Jakey

  13. Make Gail buy you a cart to go behind her bike and make her take you every time (except when she crashes of course).

    Your Pals,

    Murphy & Stanley

  14. Bertie - That's terrible news. Thank heavens you're around to speed the healing process.

  15. I think it's very reasonable to ban ALL humans from bikes unless pawperly supervised by a canine.

  16. Well thank the Lord Gail just had bruises and scrapes. We had a Ghost Ride in Nati Monday. When a rider dies because of an accident on a bike trail other riders take off from a designated area and ride to where the accident happen and have a service and leave the person's bike painted white where they died.
    Thanks for being a friend
    Sweet William The Scot