Wednesday 18 March 2020

How to keep your human occupied....

I'm guessing that many of my readers, both canine and human, are suddenly having to adapt to changes to their lifestyle, and there is a danger that some humans might be finding themselves with time to fill.

As always, you can rely on your friend Bertie to come up with a useful suggestion to help you while away the empty hours!

Gail and I are back in Aberdeen now, but on Monday we were supposed to meeting one of her cousins down in England. When the cousin cancelled late the previous evening due to concerns about coronavirus, Gail was in danger of being under occupied for a few hours.

So in retrospect it was thoughtful and generous of me, in the early hours of Monday, to make sure Gail was not at a loss for something to do later that morning.

You know how it is when, for some unexplained reason your bladder goes into overdrive?  That's what happened to me at about 5 a.m. I gave Gail a little nudge (we were staying at Janet's house, where I am allowed on the bed, or at least have been so far....).  But my dear owner seemed to want to ignore me and pretend she was still asleep. Instead of making a big fuss and insisting on being let me out, I decided it would be better all round if I simply squatted down to relieve myself, copiously, on the nice absorbent quilt.

I can report that Gail roused herself all of a sudden when she realised what was going on...

So  thanks to me, Gail was then busy for the rest of the morning, washing the sheets, covers and 'mattress protector' and  taking the big quilt to the launderette - an experience which, by the way, not only filled a couple of otherwise empty hours but also enabled her to mentally time-travel back to her student days in a house without a washing machine.

But can you believe, Gail has yet to show one tiny flicker of gratitude to me for my efforts on her behalf?

At least the whole day was not a 'washout'. We went across town to check up on Human Granny and Granddad's final resting place, visited an old family friend and then had a pleasant stroll along the nearby River Trent.

I think I am almost forgiven. Gail says we are fortunate indeed that Janet is such a kind and tolerant host.

And OK, I'll admit that peeing on a bed belonging to one of your best friends is perhaps not such a great idea after all...


  1. da phenny likes such an idea, he decorated our dads bed many times when he was pixxed (literally). Enjoy the super weather and long walks and stay safe and sound

  2. Hari OM
    Well, Bertie lad, you were surely desperate. And Gail will be paying more attention in the future! I am off to collect a rental car this arvo, for 10 days. I shall scoot back to Dunoon for the weekend, take pa out for a couple of trips and help Anne out as her car needs professional help... (Yes, am still on duty as she's been down with a lurgy). Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

    1. Gail certainly will pay attention in future! (It's the first time Bertie has done anything like this). Good to hear you'll at least be able to get back and check up on the Hutch.

  3. Oh Bertie and Gail...I am very happy you don't have audio abilities on your comment box. I am giggling just a wee bit. I'm so sorry about the accident Bertie...I truly know what you mean about a bladder going in overdrive in the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes I try to ignore it too. However, after reading, "I pee Freely" by Bertie I will no longer ignore it.
    I often think what a mess I would have should I S N E E Z E..
    Hugs Cecilia

  4. Oh Bertie, you naughty boy! Couldn't you have found some other way to occupy Gail's time? I hope you're not going to do that every time you think she needs something to do!

    Inca xx

  5. Pretending to be asleep was not the bestest of ideas. oops!

  6. Bertie you had better be careful or Gail might put a nappy on you and that would be worse than the cone of shame.
    Sweet William The Scot

  7. Hey, you GAVE Gail the option of taking you out. She chose to ignore you. It was all her fault!

  8. You are lucky that Janet loves you so much Bertie. It looks like you had a lovely day to be outside.

  9. It was the thought that counts were just planning Gail's day for her ;-)!
    Rosy, Jakey & Arty

  10. We hope Gail learnt her lesson--don't ignore the Dog!!!

  11. Dear Bertie, just recently to show my displeasure to my lady, who is a lovely Lady, whom I live very much (in spite of her flaws), I peed on the bed. I did not think of it as helping her pass the time though. Will keep that in mind for a future time.

  12. Oh Bertie, we bet the next time you nudge Gail, she will be up in a flash. At least the afternoon looks like it was enjoyable.

    Woos, Lightning and Timber

    Woos, Lightning and Timber

  13. BUT, you did keep her occupied for hours!!!! And, you took an important step toward training her so that she'll leap out of bed the next time that you nudge her.

    I love the green grass! We are getting a lot of snow tomorrow which will make the grass greener in a few months but the ground will remain white until then!

  14. We think you were being very generous and don't understand your mom's problem

  15. Oh boy! Wells, that what the peeps get for ignoring us, rights?? hehehee
    Sorry abouts the quilt, butts at least everything is fresh as a daisy nows, right?? ☺
    Ruby ♥

  16. That will teach her not to ignore you Bertie! And you reminded our mom that every time we nudge her, it not just because we want a cookie!

    Kiki and Rosie