Can you believe that us dogs don't always get the local park to ourselves?
For example, I came across this notice today during our Saturday afternoon perambulation.
Imagine my horror! I mean normally I get to run around wherever I like. But for some reason Gail saw fit to snap my lead straight back on and started issuing tedious instructions about not straying over the white boundary line or chasing after the men dressed in white clothes.
Well, I said to Gail, you're always trying to get me to fetch a ball (so far without success, but that's another story....) Surely that means I can join in? I mean any game that can involve bowling a maiden over has to be good fun, no? After all, that's what I do to Daisy Dachshund at puppy class every week....
Gail laughed - in an ever so slightly patronising way, I felt - and asked if I'd considered which fielding position I'd like to try. Well, obviously, 'fine leg', I replied and was just a bit hurt when she said no Bertie I think 'silly mid off' would be more your thing. Or perhaps 'slip'.
Well we clearly weren't getting anywhere, and to be perfectly honest, the game of cricket is just a teeny weeny little bit slow if you're only allowed to spectate. I persuaded Gail to let me go and introduce myself to some new friends, for once choosing doggies approximately my own size.
She started telling me to 'play with a straight bat' or I'd find myself on a 'sticky wicket'. Did I have any idea what all this meant?
Frankly I was stumped.